February already! Is your New Years Resolution already a distant memory?
You start the year with such great intentions, you're on holiday! Full of optimism that this year will be so different from the last.
Yet by February, you're back doing the same old stuff, in the same old way.
Why is this?
Most of us try to change behaviour without looking at our beliefs about ourselves, or the influences that have caused our behaviour.
For example - how many of you were rewarded with 'treats' as a child - lollies, chocolates, doughnuts - and now you 'treat' yourself with indulgent snacks. Lost a kilo? - have a treat.
Done well at work? - have a treat.
Bored? Sad? Angry? - you deserve a treat.
Certainly, an occasional treat is fine - our health starts to suffer if there is a treat at morning tea, another with lunch, an afternoon treat, one before dinner, something after dinner - and then a snack before bed.
The same applies to any addictive behaviour - drinking, gambling, smoking, shopping... Self-destructive behaviour happens when you don't believe you deserve anything better, or you are punishing yourself for not being enough. You may want to become a better version of yourself however, deep inside you don't really believe you can do it - you've tried before and you failed
Until the new behaviour is automatic, you need to use willpower to make the change.
Willpower is vital to initiate change, however, it is not meant to sustain it.
How many of you start the day full of enthusiasm and commitment, only to come crashing down when work, tiredness and the rest of life takes over? It's easy during holidays - you have the energy and time to focus on your new goals.
What can you do?
If you can change your beliefs and clear the negative influences that have been affecting you - your behaviour automatically changes.
HOW COOL IS THIS???
Instead of starting with trying to change the old behaviour, you need to dig a little to see why you are acting this way.
How do I know it's time...? for a snack... to go shopping... have a drink... to not exercise... to procrastinate... yell at the kids...
I'm tired..., I'm cranky..., Someone is annoying me..., I'm angry with myself..., I want to make myself feel better..., I'm bored..., It's not worth it..., I'm not worth it..., Why bother?
Do you sound just like your mother?
Do you have the same relationship with your health as your Dad?
Has a partner or ex-partner influenced the way you spend?
There are so many ways to be influenced by the actions or words of others.
Most of the time it is our unconscious mind that takes in the information and determines how this will affect us.
Once you are truthfully looking at the answer then you can initiate lasting change.
Once you have cleared the negative influences and limiting beliefs - the reasons you are hanging on to unwanted behaviour also go.